I came into two sobbing boys at 11pm last night.  They were missing their puppy Bubba.  I got Bubba when I was pregnant with Austin (oldest child) and he died last year.  We still aren't over the loss.  He was the family pet.  We had him for 12 years. Than the past 5 years of his life we shared him with my parents. Mostly because where we lived we couldn't have him. But also because he was getting old and his body wasn't functioning as good as it used to, and their house was easier on his old bones. I tried to tell them how I had night terrors before he ever died... dreams that he died & I felt bad that I didn't give him enough attention.  He was my first baby. When I was having a bad day, he was always loyal and there. Last night I was peppered with questions... "But where is he NOW? Will I recognize him in Heaven? What about YOU Mommy - are you going to be an adult or grown up in Heaven?? Am I going to Heaven? I miss BUUUBBBAA *SOB sob hiccup." 

I came on this poem that sums it up nicely..I don't know if it's true or not... but I love it...

 stood by your bed last night, I came to have a peep.
I could see that you were crying, you found it hard to sleep.
I whined to you softly as you brushed away a tear,
"It's me, I haven't left you, I'm well, I'm fine, I'm here."
I was close to you at breakfast, I watched you pour the milk
You were thinking of the many times your hands reached down to me.
I was with you at my grave today, you tend it with such care.
I want to re-assure you, that I'm not lying there.
I walked with you towards the house as you fumbled for your key.
I gently put my paw on you, I smiled and said, "It's me."
You looked so very tired, and sank into a chair
I tried so hard to let you know that I was standing there.
""It's possible for me to be so near you every day
To say to you with certainty, "I never went away.""
You sat there very quietly, then smiled; I think you knew...
In the stillness of that evening, I was very close to you.
The day is over... I smile and watch you yawning
And say "good-night, God bless, I'll see you in the morning."
And when the time is right for you to cross the brief divide,
I'll rush across to greet you and we'll stand, side by side.
I have so many things to show you, there is so much for you to see.
Be patient, live your journey out... then come home to be with me.
~Author Unknown~
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8/9/2011 14:25:38

Sigh. Sniffle. Some days I miss my Taxi cat so bad...

Reply
Bex
8/9/2011 17:40:01

I feel for the little guys. They're like "Mom, why AREN'T you crying right now too???" I cry for him buddies. I do...

Reply
darla
8/10/2011 01:50:43

ah!! thats so sad twin :( he was a awesome dog!

Reply
bex
8/10/2011 16:55:42

Yes TWIN. He was an awesome dog...

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    RANTINGS
    FROM
    THE
    TIME
    OUT
    CORNER.....

    Dear Twin... sometimes words come out of my mouth before my brain has a chance to stop them... well aint that the life...

    Bex

    Some people make parenting look sooo easy.  They are big fat liar pants.  Parenting is hard.  Kids can be awful.  They don't come with an Instruction Manual.  I started young and have grown up with them.  We have gone through a lot together.  And I would have never been able to do it without the wonderful family I have.  I started blogging because of Twin.  She said that it wasn't nice of me to take a Bad Day out on the Hubby or the Brats.  And so this began.... it's my Rantings From The Time Out Corner... because, let's face it - when I'm full on Cranky Pants... my hubby doesn't fail to make me go Sit One Out for the Team.  (for more see ME above)

    CONTACT ME!
    I would like your thoughts, help, comments, feedback. I am not a robot!
    bextwinz@gmail.com

    Motto:
    No matter how serious life gets, you still gotta have that one person you can be completely stupid with 

    I STALK THESE....

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    TWIN
    Picture
    ANGEL
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    MONIQUE
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    LAUREN
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    THE MRS
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    WHISPERING WRITER
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    RONI