Mom - how many years until I grow up?
What are you talking about? You're NEVER going to grow up!
MAAWWWM. I already asked the teacher. She said in 9 years. 9 years and I'll be grown up.
Well. In 9 years you'll be 18 and a legal adult. But that doesn't mean you're grown up.
FIIINEEE. I'll get married. Than I'll be grown up.
I don't remember giving you permission to be married. Nope. Never growing up. Never getting married.
MOOOOOOOOOOOM.
PE teacher to me:
I have to tell you something about your boys. They're completely the opposite! The oldest one I could never get to talk and the youngest I can never get to shut up!
Mom you don't water your plants.
I do to -- I water the inside ones. I let God water the outside ones.
Mom -- that's not God watering them. That's tears of joy.
This is how sheltered I am. At 32 years old, I heard a slang term I've never heard before.
Pepperbelly.
One guy was kidding around with another one and said it in a sentence.
So I googled it.
Mom - I'm going to be a Nazii zombie for halloween.
A WHAT? followed by a 30 minute butt chewing about the "N" word. I was furious.
MOOOOOOM MOM MOMOM OMOM CALM. DOWN. It's in our video game. We kill the N's and they die and come back and Zombie N's. It's ok!!
Can we refer to them as something else please?
OK - Can I be a Russan Zombie?
How do we get pee out of a couch cushion?
Lysol, cleaning stuff, wash it, etc etc?
You don't get it. On his 3 hour sick-coma-sleep, the little guy peed All. The. Way. Thru. the cushion. and I'm pretty sure some of it might have hit the back cushion that doesn't come out.
We can throw the couch away and just use the spare one from the kids's room?
Butch has trained our dog to howl whenever the 877C*shNow commercial comes on. It's hilarious. He'll drop whatever's in his mouth and sing away.
Took the kids to see Rio at the local movies. For $8, one kid & one adult gets in to see 10 weeks worth of movies. I'm stuck in a 20 minute line for the popcorn. When I bring the goodies to the 3 kids & Butch (and the movie is 20 minutes in) -- B looks at me and says "Yes, but where's the nachos??"
A tragic thing happened nearby today. Just proved that sometime's "No Good Deed Goes Unpunished" (as quoted from one of my employees). There was a lady driving terribly who's car ended up getting smashed, banged, and up a rock wall with her being thrown from it. Two Good Samaritans actually got out of their cars to help her. When out of nowhere a bon-a-fide IDIOT drove around the stopped vehicles, hitting one of the Good Samaritans!! It blocked the highway into our town for hours. I-D-I-O-T ... to put it mildly....